Women of Faith and spiritual abuse

I am a woman who loves and follows Jesus. I was married for 19 years to a man who I thought was a Christian. I expected to have a loving home and family, and to be married to him for my entire life, “until death do us part.”

When I realized he was covertly abusing me, my life shattered. I had to reevaluate all I thought I knew about God and Christianity.

Just like so many other women of faith who divorce a covert abuser, the Christian church and community failed me. I was betrayed by several of my close friends. Some sided with him, others shunned me for “gossiping” or being “bitter.”

The Bible became a weapon used against me and scriptures were hurled at me to show me how I was doing everything wrong. Only two friends were able to be like Jesus and sit with me in my pain, and those were precious moments because, through them, I saw how Jesus is.

Through this journey I got free from the bondage of legalistic, conservative evangelicalism and found Jesus Himself, the loving One. I discovered that Jesus was right there in the middle of my suffering, not the one who “arranged” it. He held me close and taught me about true love, acceptance, and compassion. He will do the same for you.

I understand the profound confusion and challenges we face when we are trying to get free from abuse as women of faith. You can read more about them in the articles below.

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If you’d like to join other women in their journey of healing from the trauma of spiritual abuse and emotional and psychological spousal abuse, and learn practical tools for healing, you can read about the Arise Healing Community here.

This is a beautiful song about supporting one another in our pain. I cry every time I listen to it, and it’s my heart for each of you:

 

What can I bring to your fire?
Shall I sing while the roof is coming down
Can I hold you while the flames grow higher
Shall I brave the heat and come close with you now
Can I come close now?